As football season approaches, we will soon read and hear about new stadiums, schedules, rules, coaches, uniforms, Heisman trophy candidates, and more. I suggest something else new: new lingo for the announcers and broadcasters.
Specifically, I would enjoy hearing a play-by-play report that doesn’t include these tired phrases, which are long overdue for linguistic funerals:
“electrified the crowd”
“whale of a ball game”
“a whole new ball game”
“Chamber of Commerce day”
“will beat you with his legs”
“great downhill runner”
“throws underneath”
“cut out the lights, the party’s over”
“smash mouth football”
“quarterback must find his rhythm”
“field goal no longer than a chip shot”
“third down and a mile”
“Hail Mary pass”
“not over till it’s over”
“real nail biter”
“return to the glory days”
“last nail in the coffin”
“game of the decade”
“step up and make a play”
“took the crowd out of the game”
“left nothing on the field”
“got his game face on”
“surreal atmosphere”
“real barn burner”
When football analysts start using fresher phrases, I’ll quit wearing out my TV mute button
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